This is probably (i.e definitely)
not the best way to approach college:
Sex, like alcohol, is something that comes as a part of college culture, whether or not anyone wants to admit it.
But it does. Even great places like UVA.
And with it, comes complications.
The best things you can do are be educated and take care of yourself.
Now, this is what pop culture has deemed as the norm with sex is this:
It’s not always like that though.
Sex is no small thing. It’s something that you owe to yourself and your body and your partner to treat with respect.
In terms of UVA policy and resources, here are some good things to know:
- No means No. Period. End of story. The absence of saying no, doesn’t mean yes. Even saying yes really sometimes means no. And if there’s alcohol involved then any sort of ‘yes’ isn’t valid. UVA takes consent extremely seriously.
- We have great resources if you have questions about sex, especially safe sex. Student Health and even your Resident Advisors are good places to start. Seriously, they know that sex happens, and care more about informing and supporting you than anything else. Peer Health Educators are good for this too.
- Take care of yourselves and your bodies. If you ever feel that something might be wrong, again, talk to someone. There is a free clinic in Charlottesville if you’re ever worried about money, insurance, parents, etc. Especially in a college town, they know how to handle and help these situations.
- Look out not only for yourself but for each other too. If you notice a friend is in an unsafe or unhealthily situation or relationship there are ways to help. We pride ourselves for living in a community of trust. Us wahoos have to look out for one another!
- Overall, just be safe. Make healthy choices, always have a buddy to walk with or go out with, and treat yourself and others with respect.
Having urges to do things is pretty normal at our age. Communication with your partner is really the key. Even communication with your friends too, chances are they have felt or thought similar things. Most importantly though (as cliché as it may sound) is communication with yourself. There is a tendency to feel that ‘everyone is doing it’ and something is wrong if you’re not (or don’t want to) be doing it to. You owe yourself honesty, and your body too. Sex, hook-ups, and relationships are not a competition.
To end on a happy note though, at the end of the day you’re going to meet a lot of wonderful people in college. You’ll make a lot of friends. You may even make a few ‘more than friends.’ It’s certainly an incredibly exciting time in your life to explore and try new things. We want that for you. We just want you to be safe.
So with that, forge on and make good choices young wahoos! We believe in you!